Yesterday, I started working out for the first time in EIGHT YEARS!
My goodness, it was rough. By the third set of jumping jacks, I was ready to call it quits. But, I didn’t. I kept going, pushed through, and came out on the other side of that workout feeling pretty proud.
Today, despite being sore, I pushed myself to do it all over again. It’s only the second day, but I was able to get myself through it a bit easier than yesterday. I still had a hard time, but I got through it!
I don’t know if it’s just me. Maybe it is. I got to a point where I just didn’t care about my weight. Somehow, I was comfortable with being lumpy, with being out of shape, and with eating every time I became even a little bit stressed out. Sometimes, it wasn’t even about stress. Sometimes, I ate simply because I was bored.
My husband wasn’t concerned with my weight, so I told myself it was okay. Eating out of boredom was fine. Filling up on sweets was fine. Drinking several cans of Dr. Pepper a day was fine. I don’t know how I got there and I don’t know how I was so comfortable with it.
Last Sunday, I decided I was done with soda. Period. I was also done with sweets and other junk food. When I bought my little journal, I knew I didn’t want to ever have to write down four cans of Dr. Pepper in a day. Nor did I want to write down cakes or cookies or a whole bag of Doritos.
This weekend, I will be a full two weeks without pop or junk food. I drink several bottles of water everyday. I’ve even gotten to where I don’t mind drinking it at room temperature. That’s huge for me!
It’s not all about being comfortable with a different lifestyle, of course. A huge part of it is my kids. When Presley is old enough, I want to be able to go outside with her and run around the yard without feeling like I’m going to die. I want to have the stamina and energy to keep up with her. Ava, my oldest, wants me to go for jogs with her. And, most importantly, I want to teach my kids a healthier lifestyle. I don’t want to be tired and unhealthy, because I want to be there for as many of their big moments as possible. Longevity is key in all of that.
And, of course, I want to feel confident in myself. Putting on a pretty shirt only to pull it back off after noticing how it draws attention to your lumps and bumps isn’t a good feeling. At least not for me. I don’t enjoy sitting down and watching my tummy bulge out or seeing the dips in my hips with that awful little muffin top hanging out over the top of my jeans. For me at least, it’s a mood-killer. I look down, see my rolls, and immediately look for something to cover it with. It embarrasses me.
I want to feel happy and confident in my own skin.
So, here’s to workout number two and my journey to a healthier, stronger version of myself!